First of all, I feel like it must be said but this blog is indirect memory of those that I know, and have lost here on earth, but Heaven has gained. Today was supposed to be like any other normal Monday. The start of a new month as well, supposed to be a pretty easy day. Unfortunately, sometimes our best intentions for a day end up being God’s most purposeful directions instead. Upon my first stop, a good man that I take care of went to be with the Lord.
It was like a weird blur….arriving and nothing seeming to be different. The family seemed mellow because their dad was not feeling well; but nothing seemed to resemble anytime. A empathetic conversation and a few mild hugs led me outside where I continued with my regular service. Then after finishing I wrapped my service up on my handheld and went for the closing signature. Chaos felt immenant once I entered the back door….both the live-in daughter and her daughter who lived next door, were frantically moving around the living room when the younger daughter said “Not a good time….” while streaming tears cleansed her make up.
I was gone only 20 minutes….maybe. I tried to bring some comfort to the daughter & grand-daughter, but only a brief hug brought more weeping. I quietly told them I loved them and would see myself out. I sat in my truck for a few moments in silence as my own tears began to flow and I prayed to my Lord to comfort their pain. Yet, even with that I still had a lingering feeling that wouldn’t go away….I was only gone less than 20 minutes.
A few days past and I am still plagued by the suddenness of finality. Then, I knock on another door only to hear the husband died of a brain tumor 2 weeks ago. This customer I was just getting to know, but I knew he was a good man and it brought me to tears again. This isn’t the first time, nor the second that this has happened in my life. Knowing someone is sick and not doing well is one thing….knowing them deeply personally is another. All my mind is overcome with even as I write this is….I had just saw them not long ago….in a blink of an eye, in an exhaled breath….they are gone.
Whether they’re friends, family or customers; they are purposely placed in your life with God’s hand. In the 4 years thus far I have worked with Terminix, I have painfully seen lives change before me. Whether in death, divorce, or job loss; the effect of what I’ve seen has stuck with me as God intends it to. This week alone has revamped a burning desire in my heart that whatever I say, whatever I do in the presence of anyone, I need to love as Christ! I may be the last of Jesus or (God forbid & forgive) the last added negative to this harsh sin-soaked life that they experience.
We never will know the time and place of Christ’s return (Matthew 24:36), as well as the moment of our death. So the question needing responded to is: WHY WASTE PRECIOUS MOMENTS NOT LOVING ONE ANOTHER? WHY ALLOW FEAR TO MUTE YOUR LIPS? WHAT IF??…. I never said a memorable goodbye to any of them. I never made sure they all knew Jesus before their punched finality. I….just….never….knew.
I need to pray more….
I need to embrace His holy word deeper.
I need to love without irritation.
I need to be humble before the noise.
I live the farthest away from my family and Amber hers….my fear is that our last visit each time may be our last with that person. What would be their last remembrance of you? Would they see you in a negative shade? Or would they see Jesus through your filthy rags?
Would your co-workers remember the dirty joke you last repeated? Or the devotional you shared with them about Satan’s demons defeated? What would be your spouse’s last thought? Was it the fight you two selfishly fought? Or was it the guidance of Christ on your knees that you both tearfully sought?
No matter the time constraint, no matter your joy that felt a bit taint. The reality is, it’s not worth putting it as the period in the chapter of regret. We MUST get on with the task of defacing our masks. Our job is to live like every day is our last so we can continue the party in heaven and have an eternal BLAST!
Love more….Fear less….give Jesus your everyday BEST. Don’t let another opportunity pass because truly it may be your last….praying for those we’ve lost and for those we have yet to touch.